A list of things that randomly count

Phrases and or words that I do not like:

Cluster-fuck (Brings to mind a bunch of squirrels doing illegal stuff)
Beef-cake (Here I literally envision a cake of beef.)
Kid(s) (As in, "My kid here ain't never been in no trouble.")
Bucks (As in, "This suit, this suit, it ran me something like 150 bucks." Well, when you spend in stratospheric levels don't you think you owe it to yourself to go with the more traditional wording of "dollars".)
Teats - It's just rude and I still don't know how farmers and vetrinarians can utter it without reddening.

Funny titles for books:
"Stephen Falls, but Stephanie Cries: Crisscross Signals in Fraternal Twins"
" 'Is It Okay to Kiss My Really Hot Cousin?' Etiquette Lessons for the Modern Teen"
" 'You need a chastity belt'! (Un)Kindly Advice from Grandmas"
" 'My Life's Work Here is Done.' The Life of Colette Wikey—America's Pre-eminent Crochet Artist"
"New Faces, Places and Positions, 2003: Dade County's Police Prostitution Log Book"
" 'So Wrong, So Right'....The Lives of Gunner and Hunter Nelson"
"The 5 Year Old Executive: Teaching your Child to Raise Himself"
"Community Living: A Concept Espoused by People with Limited Ambition"
"Sea Monkeys and Other Shit That was Disappointing"
"10 Arguments for the Roadie's Lifestyle (Plus 4 FRICKIN' AWESOME photos)"
"Wiggity, Wiggity, Whaaaaa? The Definitive Rapper's Hand-Book"

My personal favorite:
" 'No, I won't let you boss me around anymore!': Verbal strategies to disengage bullies"
Plus it's exciting sequel:
" 'Gimme the Glock!!: Moving beyond words"


Good names for movie characters:
Twitch LaChaise
Scotty Potomac (hint: not Scottie's real name)
Johm "The Metronome" Kasamagis
Joanna Pochadis